Friday, December 7, 2018

War Report: The Hermit's Enclave

As is tradition, every time I return to EVE after a hiatus, I get things kicked off with a solo wardec against a carebear corporation.

Now, since I started doing this, several years ago, there have been some nerfs which have changed the way one must go about solo wardecs. Most notably the watchlist nerf, which put pretty much everyone else who enjoyed this playstyle out of business.

In the post-watchlist landscape, the only practical way to do it is to plant a spy alt in a corporation, and then just hope they turn out to be worthy targets - as opposed to vile, cowardly wardec evaders. So I duly logged in a spy alt, selected a promising target corporation - The Hermit’s Enclave - and planted him in their corp.

The Hermit’s Enclave
This was a medium sized (30ish member) mining corp, with a home base on a highsec island in Aridia. A relatively well managed corp overall, they mostly used wormhole chains to move in and out of their area, in order to avoid the daily lowsec gate camps.

I moved my spy alt out to join them with his venture and assessed the situation. A half dozen people logged in most of the time, mining in highsec. An Orca guy, some mining barges. About a half billion in vulnerable assets sitting in the hangar that I could access.

Then I logged in my PvP main, Syeed Ameer Ali, and created a new corporation - Dirtbag Space Warriors Coming for yor Loots [DSWCF]. I dropped a wardec on them.

Financial Woes
Now at this point I was dirt poor in terms of space moneys. A few hundred million in the wallet, maybe a billion isk in assets - mostly tied up in doctrine ships, out in nullsec, from my term of service as a Goon during the last great war.

As a matter of principle, I do not krab, I do no industry, I do not buy PLEX. I make all of my isk from loot, ransoms, scams, and heists. As such, there are times of feast and famine, but I am spacepoor more often than I am spacerich.

I firesaled some stuff out in null and invested a significant portion of my wealth in a Stratios, then made a plan.

The Assault
The wartargets felt secure on their island, and were mining away without a care in the world. There was an Orca and a Skiff in an asteroid belt. They had bookmarked a highsec-to-highsec wormhole to travel in and out.

I used my spy alt to guide Syeed Ameer Ali to the far side of the wormhole, then sidled up beside the Orca in my Venture. When I was in position, I had Syeed enter the wormhole, and “warp to member” on the spy alt. I figured that if I could ransom that Orca it would alleviate my poverty somewhat.

Failure (and Consolation)
Alas, the enemy was on the ball, and somehow both Orca and Skiff managed to warp away as I landed in the belt.

I then realized that I had probably burned my spy alt by so obviously providing the warp in. I was so rusty at this, after years away from the game. I spent a little while trying to taunt the wartargets into undocking and fighting me, but they were unwilling.

[ 2018.10.28 19:39:08 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > Tamaris Solette o7
[ 2018.10.28 19:39:20 ] Tamaris Solette > hello sir
[ 2018.10.28 19:39:39 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > 1 billion isk and I drop the war
[ 2018.10.28 19:39:50 ] Tamaris Solette > hahaha
[ 2018.10.28 19:39:51 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > it's a fair deal
[ 2018.10.28 19:40:27 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > talk amongst yourselfs, if everyone contributes it isn't much
[ 2018.10.28 19:41:37 ] Trenus > lmao
[ 2018.10.28 19:41:41 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > otherwise, i haunt you
[ 2018.10.28 19:41:57 ] Trenus > cute
[ 2018.10.28 19:42:28 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > i will follow you wherever you go
[ 2018.10.28 19:42:49 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > at the most inconvenient times, there i'll be
[ 2018.10.28 19:43:12 ] Trenus > you sound like my ex
[ 2018.10.28 19:43:16 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > i am the last of the dirtbag pirates of eve
[ 2018.10.28 19:43:34 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > and this is what i do
[ 2018.10.28 19:43:44 ] xKolax > stand up comedy?
[ 2018.10.28 19:44:02 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > 1 billion isk. for now, the offer stands
[ 2018.10.28 19:44:21 ] Fuffuzar > Sounds like an easy way to try make money
[ 2018.10.28 19:44:35 ] Fuffuzar > Good luck you 1 person against an alliance..
[ 2018.10.28 19:44:44 ] Fuffuzar > Sounds like great fun..
[ 2018.10.28 19:44:58 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > when this is all over, you will be able to say, "that guy syeed, he is the oldest and best of the pirates, last of a dying breed"
[ 2018.10.28 19:45:16 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > "he really fucked us up"
[ 2018.10.28 19:45:44 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > "almost to the point that is was worth it, just to behold him in action..."
[ 2018.10.28 19:46:00 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > "we will remember this all our lives"
[ 2018.10.28 19:46:03 ] Fuffuzar > Lmao.. Ill look forward to that..
[ 2018.10.28 19:46:12 ] Fuffuzar > Are you Zlatan?
[ 2018.10.28 19:46:17 ] Fuffuzar > Sounds like
[ 2018.10.28 19:46:19 ] xKolax > what was your name again?  I forgot already.   I dozed off
[ 2018.10.28 19:46:32 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > Syeed Ameer Ali is my name
[ 2018.10.28 19:47:34 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > 1 billion isk
[ 2018.10.28 19:47:47 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > I also accept assets of equiavalent value sometimes
[ 2018.10.28 19:47:56 ] Fuffuzar > Ye.. That is what a merch corp takes to haunt your ass down
[ 2018.10.28 19:48:23 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > Mercs like me ;D
[ 2018.10.28 19:48:44 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > I'm afraid you'll find no help there
[ 2018.10.28 19:48:56 ] Fuffuzar > I dont?
[ 2018.10.28 19:49:04 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > good thinking though, i like that you're trying
[ 2018.10.28 19:49:55 ] Fuffuzar > I like that you are aswell
[ 2018.10.28 19:51:55 ] Fuffuzar > Goonswarm seems to like you eh? You got your ass kicked by em.. Now you need isk..
[ 2018.10.28 19:58:33 ] Tamaris Solette > looks like you've already pilfered 590 million or so from us via your alt  Spy Alt. I regret to inform you that you won't be getting anything else from us.
[ 2018.10.28 20:00:43 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > Tamaris Solette I have 3 more worms in your corp. You will pay, you just don't realize it yet.
[ 2018.10.28 20:01:09 ] Syeed Ameer Ali > I am the last of the dirtbag pirates of eve. Everybody pays.

So I threw up my hands and gave up. The war was a failure. In hindsight, this was probably a premature decision, but it made sense to me at the time.

In disgrace, I slunk away, looking for another target. I did send an email to The Hermit’s Enclave as I left, angling for some ransom to end the war, but it was a feeble effort and I knew it.

My consolation prize was the 500 million isk of stuff that I looted from the corp hangars with my spy alt and sold on contracts, before planting him in another corporation.

Tune in next episode as our hero gets his groove back, and finds more fertile fields to plow...

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